I Woke Up

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I Woke Up
By Jameson Fitzpatrick

and it was political.
I made coffee and the coffee was political.
I took a shower and the water was.
I walked down the street in short shorts and a Bob Mizer tank top
and they were political, the walking and the shorts and the beefcake
silkscreen of the man posing in a G-string. I forgot my sunglasses
and later, on the train, that was political,
when I studied every handsome man in the car.
Who I thought was handsome was political.
I went to work at the university and everything was
very obviously political, the department and the institution.
All the cigarettes I smoked between classes were political,
where I threw them when I was through.
I was blond and it was political.
So was the difference between “blond” and “blonde.”
I had long hair and it was political. I shaved my head and it was.
That I didn’t know how to grieve when another person was killed in America
was political, and it was political when America killed another person,
who they were and what color and gender and who I am in relation.
I couldn’t think about it for too long without feeling a helplessness
like childhood. I was a child and it was political, being a boy
who was bad at it. I couldn’t catch and so the ball became political.
My mother read to me almost every night
and the conditions that enabled her to do so were political.
That my father’s money was new was political, that it was proving something.
Someone called me faggot and it was political.
I called myself a faggot and it was political.
How difficult my life felt relative to how difficult it was
was political. I thought I could become a writer
and it was political that I could imagine it.
I thought I was not a political poet and still
my imagination was political.
It had been, this whole time I was asleep.

Source: Poetry (January 2017)

Jameson Fitzgerald © Jacques Servin

Jameson Fitzpatrick © Jacques Servin

 

 

Jameson Fitzpatrick teaches Writing at New York University(NYU) in New York City

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Election Anxiety | What’s Ahead

‘How Understanding Depression Helped Me Through Election Anxiety’
| Review by kiley
Article on Bipolar Advantage Blog

scary face behind the curtain - by kiley 17

scary face behind the curtain – by kiley 17

The title intrigued me. No fear – the article is simply written and some is about understanding the Bipolar-IN-Order state of being. Working on mood changes in a beneficial way. No one is perfect so it is a continual process to work toward my goals. Increasing my self awareness is essential. As I state No one is perfect but I am identifying when something is at too high an intensity level. I make a valiant effort to lower the intensity. Sometimes by my partner just saying Stop [I do hear Stop in my own head – not as perfect a method]. Not pretending its easy is important to remember. Patience and letting go into a Zen state – calm state is extremely important to achieve.

The part of the article that pertains to a great many of us who feel Election Anxiety [a major issue at present] and the imaginings of this writer [me]- how I have reached many fantasy levels in my dealings with Election Anxiety. It is a regular discussion in our home – election results – that is. My partner and I banter our thoughts as though in a tennis match. She feels the same about what we are saying regarding the Election Results but we express it in our own way. I imagine most of us think of ways beyond legalities of how to solve a problem like . . . (I even Hate saying his name – it gives me the creeps). When the thoughts of our upcoming future create overwhelming FEAR and ANXIETY – I start using Magic Thinking [it makes me feel better momentarily – but then I keep having to come up with more reasons the Inauguration will never happen]. Does it raise the level of Intensity in a manic state or draw one into a depression or sometimes into the in-between state. Either way there are methods in sorting out and letting go of the pressure.

This post on Bipolar Advantage regarding Election Anxiety is more than just for those who are Bipolar. The message reaches across all who are concerned with the insanity surrounding us in the political arena; and how do we go about living our lives unaware of why we feel such FEAR – F.E.A.R. = (False Evidence Appearing Real).

Spend a few moments and read this article. It may help you find some answers or at least temporary solutions needing repeating.

For Complete Article Click on LINK – it will take you there.

– kiley

Posting Simultaneously on ‘the secret keeper’

“Take Your Broken Heart….”

In a world that has felt crazy and out of control for a while now, it is a true delight to know that there are women in the world like the radiant Viola Davis and the incomparable Meryl Streep. Their words from this year’s Golden Globe Awards are both touching and eloquent. Faced with the reality into which we are all about to be plunged, Meryl Streep’s words resonate profoundly. They bear listening to and repeating again and again.

To be used in a piece with the same title on Expats Post on Wednesday 11th January 2017